So many teens have lost sight of a clear and positive future, but we see so many reach for their highest potential when given the tools and education to do so. Please call Wolf Creek Academy if your young teen struggles with rebellion, and you need help for him or her to develop into a successful young adult. (877) 477-9653
Recognize What’s Normal, and What’s NOT
During the teenage years, the area of the brain called the prefrontal cortex is developing. This is the part of your brain that is behind your forehead. It’s your thinking cap and judgment center… which means kids can now develop their own ideals and ideas.
But how do parents distinguish between normal and abnormal rebellion in an adolescent? 1
What Is Teenage Rebellion?
Teenage rebellion is an act of highest assertion of independence and little adherence to parental advice during the teen years of a child’s life. It is called a “rebellion” because it leads to an intense confrontation between the teen and his or her parents. Teenage rebellion may seem spontaneous and illogical for parents, but there are several underlying reasons behind the behavior. 2
Two common types of rebellion are against socially fitting in (rebellion of non-conformity) and against adult authority (rebellion of non-compliance). In both types, rebellion attracts adult attention by offending it.
The young person proudly asserts individuality from what parents like or independence from what parents want, and in each case succeeds in provoking their disapproval. This is why rebellion, which is simply behavior that deliberately opposes the ruling norms or powers that be, has been given a good name by adolescents and a bad one by adults.
Parents usually dislike adolescent rebellion not only because it creates more resistance to their job of providing structure, guidance, and supervision, but because rebellion can lead to serious kinds of harm. 3
It can cause young people to rebel against their own self-interests, rejecting childhood interests, activities, and relationships that often support self-esteem.
It can cause them to engage in self-defeating and self-destructive behavior, like refusing to do school work or even physically hurting themselves.
It can cause them to experiment with high-risk excitement, like accepting dares that as a children they would have refused.
It can cause them to reject safe rules and restraints, like letting impulse overrule judgment to dangerous effect.
And it can cause them to injure valued relationships, pushing against those they care about and pushing them away.
So adolescent rebellion is not simply a matter of parental aggravation; it is also a matter of concern.
Although the young person thinks rebellion is an act of independence, it actually never is. It is really an act of dependency . Rebellion causes the young person to depend their self-definition and personal conduct on doing the opposite of what other people want.
That’s why the antidote for rebellion is the true independence offered by creating and accepting a challenge — the young person deciding to do something hard with themselves for themselves in order to grow themselves. The teenager who finds a lot of challenges to engage with, and who has parents that support those challenges, doesn’t need a lot of rebellion to transform or redefine him or herself in adolescence. 3
How To Know If Your Teen’s Rebellion Has Gone Out Of Hand?
Here are some signs that the rebellion has overshot its limits:
Prolonged display of annoyance and aggression towards parents or other family members.
Change in attitude. Less interaction with family members.
Always giving short and rude answers.
Open defiance even when outdoors or deliberately doing things asked not to be done.
Having no qualms about indulging in risky behavior activities like tobacco usage and alcohol consumption. 4
Normal Teen Behaviors
During normal adolescence, you might observe any of the following about your child’s behavior:
Is moody and secretive
Spends much of his or her time alone in their room
Gets frustrated easily and stomps out of the room
Is short-tempered and impatient, especially with parents
Doesn’t want to spend time with the family
Is late for curfew
Says things like, “Only my friends understand me! I hate it here, I wish I could leave.”
Is discontented and restless
As unpleasant as it is at times, this is all part of their way teens and pre-teens individuate from their parents—it’s part of the transition from childhood to adulthood. 4
Out-of-Control Teen Behaviors
But some behaviors are not normal. Rather, they’re warning signs. The following behaviors fit into this category:
- Being physically abusive to others or destructive in the house
- Being verbally abusive, intimidating or threatening
- Abusing a younger sibling
- Coming home drunk or high
- Staying out all night
- Getting arrested
Make no mistake—there’s something wrong with these behaviors. Parents who tell themselves “it’s just phase” or “it’s what teenagers do” are setting themselves up for a rude awakening later on.
If any of this is going on in your house, remember that the earlier you intervene with your child, the better. The sooner you tell your son or daughter that what they’re doing is not acceptable, and give him or her the tools they need to behave differently, the better. 4
Experiential Learning and Challenges Help Rebellious Teens Heal at Wolf Creek Academy
Counseling is provided for teens struggling with behavioral and emotional problems, and they meet with a licensed certified counselor at least once weekly. Daily group sessions address anger management issues and respect of authority, self-respect, rebellion, or other relevant issues. The non-threatening atmosphere of this small group session allows them to learn from each other appropriate ways of managing their respective behavioral difficulties.
Adventure therapy also provides a therapeutic context in the midst of an indoor or outdoor activity where our students are given opportunities to implement what they have been learning in individual and group counseling.
Experiencing therapeutic adventure together is not only great for the spirit but also great for bonding as a team and with our therapeutic program staff. Experiential learning opens doors for more self-discovery to take place. Our location makes it possible for year-round outdoor fun on and off-campus with ski resorts, the Appalachian Trail, waterfalls and national parks all within minutes of Wolf Creek Academy school for troubled teens!
Please call to learn more about how we help rebellious boys and girls experience a real change, and transform into responsible, respectful young adults. 1-877-477-9653.